Sunday, May 20, 2018

King of Farts

The next time you're at a funeral and things aren't as upbeat as you'd prefer, bust out this beauty.  Get a blank faced card, and use a sharpie to draw a king farting.  I can't draw well at all, so I drew a crown and some gas with the word fart in the gas to make sure everyone knew what they were looking at.  Place this card on top of the deck, face down.  Make sure the deck you're using has the same back as the blank faced card so you don't make a fool of yourself.  Turn to the widow who's paying for the shindig, fan the deck and have her just touch a card without looking at the face.  Pull the card out of the fan without showing it and hold it face down in your other hand.  Ask the puffy-eyed widow if she'd like to guess what card she picked, and execute a top change.  Regardless of what she says, tell her you can determine the card by the smell.  Take a big whiff of the card and pretend you've just smelled something terribly foul.  (It helps if you can squeak out a silent but deadly to add to the illusion.)  Announce that the card she picked stinks, and show it's the King of Farts.  If you've got one of those smoke gimmicks, now's the time to shine.  Refuse to leave until you're paid.  You don't work funerals for free.  People are dying to get you to perform their funeral.  Haha. 

The card that started it all.

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